4 I The Lovell Chronicle I October 20, 2011
I have no confidence in
my teams...or do I?
I'm not a very confident sports fan.
Never have been.
Partly, it comes from being a Wyo-
ming Cowboys fan. With the heart-
ache my beloved Pokes have given me
over the years, it hard to be boastful,
even confident. I'm loyal and even "fa-
naticar' - but always nervous.
Thus, I am no fun and not much
of a sports antagonist when it comes
to team vs. team matchups. I'm not
much of a chest-thumper and sneering David Peck
boaster.
Why would I be? The Pokes may Observations
advance to the occasional bowl game
in football, but they've been generally
mediocre on the gridiron, or worse, over the last 20 years,
subject to embarrassing blowouts, and the men basketball
has been abysmal, although I have hope for the squad un-
der new/old coach Larry Shyatt.
The Broncos have been terrible in recent years, and there
is little reason to think it will change any time soon.
And so as my Cardinals enter the World Series, as thrilled
as I am, I am still a nervous Nellie.
Maybe there a reason my favorite Winnie the Pooh
character is Eeyore.
"You're going to lose," a Texas Rangers fan might tell me.
"You're probably right," I might reply. "Have you seen our
starting pitching? You will shell us."
A colleague told me, "You talk more bad about your fa-
vorite team than anyone I know. I always think the Rangers
are going to win, even when they suck."
It true. I fret, worry and doubt. But rll watch every pitch
I can, and rll leap up, shout and run around the house
when Albert Pujols hits a home run.
A know-it-all on Fox Sport Radio - Seth Everett - was rip-
ping on Cardinals fans as I drove to Laramie Saturday, say-
ing they are among the most obnoxious fans in America,
right up there with Boston Red Sox fans (his words, not
mine). He said it because Cardinal fans think their teams
are the absolute best and can do no wrong.
Well, he doesn't know me - and he clearly doesn't know
Cardinal fans, who are some of the most polite and knowl-
edgeable fans on the planet - but not arrogant, except
when it comes to the hated, pitiful Cubs.
Case in point: I have worn Cardinals gear to Coors Field
and have been heckled by Colorado Rockies fans and even
a Red Sox fan - at Coors Field! One Rockies fan, nearly fall-
ing-down drunk, waded into the throng of Cardinals fans
at a game I attended and tried to start a fight. Now that
class.
Conversely, when my brother wore his Cincinnati Reds
gear to Busch Stadium for a Reds-Cardinals series this spring
- and this is as heated a rivalry as there is in baseball - he
didn't hear a peep from any Cardinal fan. No heckling, no
snide comments, no derogatory comments.
People think I'm a sports fan. I'm not. I'm a team fan:
Wyoming Cowboys, St. Louis Cardinals, Denver Broncos
and Los Angeles Lakers. I watch few, if any, other games. I
do not waver, I do not change teams, I do not lose interest.
But I AM nervous...all the time...especially when games re-
ally count - like the playoffs.
What those who have to listen to my whining don't re-
alize is that with it comes a tremendous power. Longtime
colleague Karla Pomeroy and I have often said that we can
cuss any team to victory. Many a time you'll hear me say
something like, "That guy doesn't deserve the money he
wants, he terrible." And then, boom! He blasts a home
run.
I sometimes wonder what it would be like to be a Steel-
ers fan or a Yankees fan or an Alabama football fan - ex-
pecting to win every game. Would it be as fun? The closest
I've come is being a Lakers fan. The Lakers have had a lot of
success over the last 30 years, and I've enjoyed their suc-
cess. And nearly everybody who isn't a fan absolutely hates
them, hates them with a passion.
I guess what it boils down to is that success breeds con-
tempt among foes and confidence, and sometimes arro-
gance, among fans. Fans are, well, fans - fanatics.
But I don't think I will ever be arrogant or hateful, except
when it comes to the Cubs, Celtics, Raiders and the Sheep
(Colorado State). Those are chief rivals of my top teams.
Hopeful? Always. Confident? Rarely.
And so I am hoping, praying, wishing and keeping my
fingers crossed that the Cardinals won't get swept by the
Texas Rangers in this year World Series, while secretly be-
lieving that they just might be a team of destiny and that
this year is their year.
There, I've said it! Gaaa! I've just doomed them. They can
never win. Really. (Wink, wink.)
Letters to the editor
Fuzzy math for politicians only
Dear Editor,
Some 70 years ago as I went
through elementary school and
high school -there was no middle
school at that time- I learned in
math class that 2+2=4. Later in
high school algebra and trigonom-
etry, I learned that you can have
a negative result in math.
Today only in politics, a neg-
ative result can be claimed as a
positive gain. As I did not go to
college and get a degree in high-
er math, I must conclude that this
fuzzy math must be taught in po-
litical science classes.
I will try to explain my think-
ing. In a recent speech the pres-
ident claimed that 185,000 new
jobs were added to the economy.
A few days later the labor depart-
ment stated that for the same pe-
riod, only 117,000 new jobs were
added. A few days later, the un-
employment report for the same
period said 400,000 jobs were
lost. Now if you add the new jobs
claimed of 185,000 and 117,000
you still come up with a less-
er amount than the jobs lost by
98,000.
Only in political fuzzy math
is this negative considered a posi-
tive gain. To me this type of add-
ing is a stretch of the facts and an
outright lie. But in politics they
say, "Oh, I just misspoke."
Now on the claim of jobs
saved, in one month you have
400,000 jobs lost and the previous
month you had 460,000 jobs lost.
That is considered as 60,000 jobs
saved. Again viewed in politics as
a positive gain.
Now on a more personal lev-
el without all the huge numbers,
let's say I have $20 and go into a
Store to buy a shirt. Shirts are on
sale and a $25 shirt is on sale for
$15, saving me $10, which by po-
litical fuzzy math I now have $30.
The shirt was not available in my
size, so I did not buy one. Political
fuzzy math says the $15 I did not
spend added to the $30 now gives
me $45. Oh, I forgot the 5% sales
tax of 75 cents I saved by not buy-
ing the shirt, which now gives me
$45.75.
I am still looking for the store
that will allow me to spend the
$25.75 the government's fuzzy
math now says I have. I guess I
will have to go to Washington
D.C., as only they seem to accept
this kind of adding. Of course they
will tell me to keep shopping at
sales and I will eventually build
that $45.75 into hundreds of dol-
lars or more and if I go to sales
and do not buy anything, some-
day I might be a millionaire. Only
until the tax man will say hand it
over and I will give them all my
fuzzy math savings except for my
$20 I started with and probably
go to jail for tax evasion.
Jim Szlemko
Adventures in a smart dog's life
Dear Editor,
Like many people around
town, I've been getting} the house
all ready for winter. With such
beautiful fall days, I was even able
to complete a few projects that
were on the list for next spring.
Ah yes, the list, my best friend.
The list keeps me out of trouble as
it reminds me of all the things I
have to do each day and for those
other projects.
Life is good as long as it is on
the list. "Yes dear, it's on the list!"
Actually, my best friend has al-
ways been a German shepherd. I
always chose the runt of the litter
as I figured they had to get smart-
er faster to survive. So, as of late,
I have been thinking it's time for
a new puppy.
My best shepherd was named
Justin and what a smart dog he
was. When one of my friends' wife
had a baby and he told me they
had named the boy Justin, I told
them how honored I was that they
named their son after my dog. For
some reason, he didn't think that
was funny.
Just how smart was Justin?
Justin was trained to be the nic-
est dog around yet at the snap of
the fingers and a word;:he would
attack. One fine weekend, I had a
female companion stay the night
and the next morning, as I had
to head to work, she exclaimed,
'¢/hat about your dog? I'm afraid
of dogs." I told her, "No worry." I
snapped my fingers and said, "On
the bed and you protect."
Justin hopped on the bed and
laid down. She said, "That's it?" I
said, "Yep" and headed to work.
When I got home that night and
came walking around the house,
who comes attacking me? Yep,
good ol' Justin. That is, until he
saw who it was. Smart dog.
I asked my friend how it went
and she said, "Your dog is amaz-
ing!" "How so," I asked. She went
on to tell me how they took a walk
together and how Justin would
not leave her side all day long.
"Well, I told him to protect."
"No, you don't understand,"
she said. "Even when I went to
the bathroom, he opened the door
and sat there!"
"Oh yeah," I said, "I forgot to
tell you he can open doors."
No, when I went and took a
shower, he opened the door and
laid there and watched me and
wouldn't leave." I looked at Justin
and said, "lucky dog."
One night, after I had let him
out to do his business, I noticed
he didn't come back right away.
I waited and whistled and called
and no Justin. It got late and so
I finally left the door open and
went to bed. The next morning, no
Justin. I drove up and down the
neighborhood but no Justin. So I
had to head to work. I got home
that night and there he is, lying
by the back door, wagging his tail.
"You're in trouble, son," I told
him. "Get in the house!" Well, 8:00
rolls around and it's time for him
to go out and he gives me that
look and wags his tail. So I look
at him and tell him, "You best be
home by 10 o'clock mister." Five
minutes to 10, there's a scratch at
the door and he was home. What
a smart dog.
Yes, Justin was like a son to
me. I remember how he used to
make me so mad whenever he
borrowed my truck. Why? Be-
cause he would never put any gas
in the tank, but then that's a story
for another time.
You know, I bet that if I was
half as smart as Justin was, my
parents would have been proud of
me, too. At least he listened.
..... :'; '-. Gary Noth
Questions about the dead horse
Dear Editor,
The article in the last week's
Chronicle concerning the "dead
horse" leaves us with two puz-
zling questions. The first being
why anyone who was "attached"
to an animal, and responsible for
its care and well-being, would
not respond to information that
the horse was down for a WEEK!
Leaving the animal open to the
elements until its body was eaten
on and "mangled" is a lack of re-
spect I can't relate to.
The second puzzling aspect
is why the first suspicion and as-
sumption as to the cause of death
was "wild animals." Far more like-
ly is one of the many ailments that
can bring a horse down, especially
an animal that is not checked on
often, such as lack of worming, or
twisted bowel, which is an excru-
ciating way to die. Also more like-
ly is death by a two-legged preda-
tor, which happens far more often
than is reported, and I have yet
to hear of any that are actually
tracked down and prosecuted.
Wild horses are shot for sport
by drunken cowboys who consider
them a nuisance, and I served on
a jury here a few years ago where
the case was indirectly tied to the
shooting of twenty-some head of
horses in a field. The killers sat
on top of a hill and shot them for
the heck of it.
So before we assume some
four-legged predator is to blame,
which I realize is preferable due
to the possibility of making a
claim on the compensation fund,
let's look at the more likely causes
first and involve the authorities
who are trained for such investi-
gations.
Sandra Scouten-Ford
Thanks to the interpretive center
Dear Editor,
We just wanted to thank
Christy Fleming and the en-
tire Heart Mountain Interpre-
tive Learning Center for opening
their doors to us recently.
The sophomore class from
Lovell High School toured the
center as a way of kicking off a
non-fiction literature unit about
World War II.
Christy did a great job of pre-
paring for us and making the
experience interactive. The stu-
dents - and teachers - learned a
lot, and hopefully the students
will take home the bigger mes-
sage of tolerance.
The center is a great as-
set to our community and if you
haven't been out there, it's worth
the trip.
Carissa Camp
LHS teacher
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